IT’S GO TIME
Are you waiting, wishing, and hoping for things to be different?
I was talking with a dear friend the other day, and I started to notice we were getting caught up in a lot of “if” and “when” statements. “When” I finish school, things will be so much easier. “If” we had a bigger house with a yard, life would be so much better. Ugh, is it the weekend yet? An alarm bell started sounding inside me, as I realized what we were doing.
We were daydreaming about how the next big thing, the light at the end of the tunnel, the greener grass was going to solve our problems. I know we’re not alone, as this is a very human inkling. Too often, we’re striving for something or wishing things were different. We blame our circumstances, our past choices, and even other people for why we’re not in a better, more realized place. It’s not that we’re unhappy, per se, but rather behind every emotion and experience, there’s a quiet aching.
The waiting, the wishing, the hoping for the day where we’ll be truly fulfilled, complete, and blissfully happy. The day when life’s puzzle pieces just fall into place and everything just makes sense. You’re healthy. You’re financially stable. Happy at work. In love. The kids are alright. I’m not sure who said it, but the sentiment goes, “People wait all week for Friday, all year for summer, all life for happiness.” And, if we’re honest, this tendency is common and all too real. As advice columnist Chelsea Leigh Trescott puts it,
“It’s been a terrible tendency, this tendency to put off living, to look at life and say this isn’t my real life, not yet at least.”
Right? Who hasn’t done this? Believe me, I’m no stranger to this tendency either, and I’ve often played the game of “What if.” With the blink of an eye, I transport myself to Boston when I was working toward my Masters degree. Waiting to finish my program, hoping to meet my soulmate, wishing I was successful and put together - you know, a “real” grownup. Everything that was happening in the present moment was simply temporary and transitionary. Instead of really embracing the moment, I would constantly conjure unfettered future scenarios in my head where I always looked good, felt good, and made reasonable decisions. I was a girl on fire. No one could stop me, and nothing life threw at me would get in my way.
But then, life did get in the way. Or rather, life happened. I had a major breakup, I lost my father to cancer, met a wonderful partner (but surprise, got pregnant unexpectedly). Suddenly, life teetered and tottered me around until I found myself in a totally different place than I expected. When this happens, you may question the universe, wonder “why me?”, or even retreat from life in general. Change and unpredictability is destabilizing, unsettling, and downright uncomfortable at times.
However, in yoga, there is a concept called santosha that can support us through the ups and downs of life, and help ground us to our present reality. Santosha is a concept part of the larger yoga theory and text - The Yoga Sutras by Patanjali. Santosha roughly translates as contentment and it teaches us to meet all parts of ourself and our life with love and acceptance. Now, don’t think it means you have to settle or accept a reality that isn’t serving you - that is NOT the idea. If anything, practicing santosha invites you to examine the bigger picture. To truly see, to notice, and to feel all the goodness that already surrounds you and is within you.
Unfortunately, Western society has conditioned to think we’re incomplete. In the search for happiness, external people, objects, and things will complete us. How often have you thought, I need a partner to be happy, I need that high-paying job to be successful, I need that new moisturizer to be young, and oh yeah, I definitely need those new yoga pants to be fit.
Self-limiting and anxiety-ridden, we walk around the world over-consuming, trying out whatever “magic” cure-all TikTok tells us to. Many of us feel like we don’t have enough and probably never will. Moreover, many of us feel like no matter what we do, we’ll never be enough. But, that is where our yoga comes into play. Through dedicated and consistent practice, you learn to strip yourself of ego and attachment, slowly peeling away the layers to see the naked truth - you are already whole. Regardless of your past - the failures and disappointments, the heartache and missteps - you are complete. Regardless of what’s to come - you are enough.
The more I lean into my yoga practice and embrace santosha, the more I am able to recognize the abundance and love that already surrounds me. Time and time again, yoga has shown me that life isn’t for putting off or dealing with - it’s for living. I invite you to acknowledge the blessings that radiate in and around you. You are a magical being, not a cog in a machine. So get out there, stop wondering “what if",” and start living. It’s go time, my friend.
